Ok so I haven't been having the greatest recall lately for various reasons, but my dream from last night I remembered very clearly when I woke up, and wondered all day whether it would turn out to be true.
First a little background. I started working in a three-month assignment at my company one year ago, October 26th, 2009. They let me go as scheduled on New Year's Eve, just at the three month mark. Then they called me back for a different position the first week in February, 2010, which I started on February 8th. This was again meant to be a three-month assignment, so I should have finished up on or around May 8th. Well, near the end of April (I guess) I was informed that I had at least until the end of May. When the end of May rolled around, I was told I had through July. At the end of July, we decided to just dispense with the termination dates, and just let me know two weeks in advance. And since then it's been that. I would know two weeks in advance. But recently, the date of October 29th was given to me as yet another possible/likely termination date for this three-month assignment. So that is the background for last night's dream.
In my dream, I was riding in the passenger's seat of my boss' car, and she was driving. Knowing full well that today was two weeks before the 29th, and having known all weekend that if she was going to let me go, she really had to say something today, I imagine I went to bed thinking to myself last night, "tomorrow's the day! Tomorrow I find out!" So we're sitting in the car, and in my dream it was today, because I said to her, "today is the day. you know. You have to give me my two weeks notice today" and she looks at me and shakes her head no and goes, "you're not leaving on the 29th".
The whole day pretty much came and went without hardly seeing her, but she swooped into my cube at ten minutes to five and whispered in my ear, "your last day is not October 31st". I am definitely still out of there, she was asked to make a plan to get me out, but it is not going to be in two weeks and my dream turned out to be right.
Now, I've had at least one other dream that I know of, it was a recurring one, that turned out to be prophetic, but this one was different. This one had me waking up going, "so strange! I had a dream that was wrong!" Because in my mind I had convinced myself that this time it was actually true, this time I really was going to be given my two weeks notice. I didn't see my boss all morning and all morning I was thinking to myself, that's so weird! I had a dream that is going to be wrong! I never suspected it was going to be right. I never expected her to say those words to me.
I have a newfound respect for the content of my dreams. I am glad I started making the effort at remembering them. I am glad to have remembered all I did about how you have to let the subconscious mind know it's important to you, know that it matters, and recording them is one way of getting that message across.
So I will pay even more attention and try even harder to remember them, and as boring and time-consuming as it may be, I think I will start recording the little snippets I remember as well, instead of dismissing them as too insignificant or (gasp!) too personal to place here.
There have been one or two that I kept to myself for that reason but even if I change the names or use code, I think I'm going to have to put it here, because I am impressed with this new tool and want to tune it up and see what it can do for me!
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If you're reading this, thanks for reading!
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Monday, October 18, 2010
Friday, October 8, 2010
October Dream Journal Continued
I had another driving dream last night. I dreamed I was on my way to NJ where I thought I might see my friend David (even though he actually lives in Texas). It was 2:17 in the afternoon but for some reason I was seeing the clock in military time, so it was 14:17. I realized I was going to have several hours to kill before meeting up with my friends for the concert I was headed down there for, so I was trying to reach David to see if he wanted to kill some time with me while I was getting ready. But all the different times I tried to call him, I could not get through. Also I had a different number for him, I was trying to reach him at 405-1715 even though this is not his number. As I was driving to NJ at 14:17 and trying to reach him to say I was only about half an hour away, I got on a highway and saw bad traffic and realized maybe I better not say I'd be there in only half an hour, since it was going to depend on the traffic. I almost made one bad move while I was driving, not really paying attention, I almost went to the right which would have taken me off the road and down a steep concrete stairway, but luckily I veered left at the last moment to stay on the road, even though the traffic was bad.
At one point when I was trying to reach him, I was in my sisters' hotel room, still having trouble getting through for whatever reason: either I couldn't remember his number, or I couldn't see what I was doing, or I couldn't figure out how to operate the hotel phone, or whatever. I just couldn't call him.
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At one point when I was trying to reach him, I was in my sisters' hotel room, still having trouble getting through for whatever reason: either I couldn't remember his number, or I couldn't see what I was doing, or I couldn't figure out how to operate the hotel phone, or whatever. I just couldn't call him.
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Thursday, October 7, 2010
Two more dreams
I dreamed about my parents a few nights ago but could remember so little I thought it hardly worth writing it down. But since I am here to record last night's dream I may as well jot down what I can recall. I remember I pulled into the driveway at dusk and knew there should be quite a few people there and was therefore surprised to see no cars in the driveway and the front door open. I went inside to find my mother, did not ask her what she and Dad were doing home and where all the cars were, or if I did ask her I forget what she said, but when I asked her where Dad was, she pointed into the bathroom (we were in the hall just outside the bathroom door) and said "He's right there". And there was my Dad, sitting on the toilet, in the same pink towel my brother-in-law was wearing when he came out on the patio last time we were there. That's all I can recall.
Last night's is also extremely spotty, but the part I remember loud and clear was being in a car on a curvy highway, and noticing the traffic ahead of me was all slowing down and stopping, stopping my own car in time and then nervously checking my rear view mirror to make sure all the cars behind us realized we were all stopped. I think there was construction or an accident in the left-hand lane.
I frequently have driving dreams, not sure what that means, I should look it up in the dream book Dianne gave me for my birthday one year.
Last night's is also extremely spotty, but the part I remember loud and clear was being in a car on a curvy highway, and noticing the traffic ahead of me was all slowing down and stopping, stopping my own car in time and then nervously checking my rear view mirror to make sure all the cars behind us realized we were all stopped. I think there was construction or an accident in the left-hand lane.
I frequently have driving dreams, not sure what that means, I should look it up in the dream book Dianne gave me for my birthday one year.
Monday, October 4, 2010
October Dream Journal
This weekend I dreamed about people from work. Saturday night, (10/2) I dreamed I was naked in bed with and about to start having sex with some Middle Eastern man, I told him to go close the bedroom door and there was Chris N. from work, in a towel (I think he just got out of the shower) reminding us that he was supposed to room with me and asking if it was still ok and basically getting me off the hook from the sex I was about to have, which I don't think I really wanted to have.
Last night (10/3) or should I say this morning, I again dreamed about someone from work. Since my last day is supposed to be the 29th of this month, Mark H. decided to move himself into my cube. He packed up all my stuff, installed some cube mirrors so he could see who was coming up behind him while he worked, and I said to him, you packed up all my stuff? And he said yeah and I said, wow, that was really ballsy of you at which point his boss Joe K. came along and I sort of rolled my eyes at him in disbelief. I couldn't believe he just packed up all my shit! And apparently was expecting me to share my cube with him for my last month, because my chair was still there, side by side with his and touching.
Last night (10/3) or should I say this morning, I again dreamed about someone from work. Since my last day is supposed to be the 29th of this month, Mark H. decided to move himself into my cube. He packed up all my stuff, installed some cube mirrors so he could see who was coming up behind him while he worked, and I said to him, you packed up all my stuff? And he said yeah and I said, wow, that was really ballsy of you at which point his boss Joe K. came along and I sort of rolled my eyes at him in disbelief. I couldn't believe he just packed up all my shit! And apparently was expecting me to share my cube with him for my last month, because my chair was still there, side by side with his and touching.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
My Favorite Quotes from MBT
Again, I haven't been blogging much lately, still mightily consumed with Tom Campbell's My Big TOE, I finished finding all of the missing hyphens I could locate, and have moved on to building the index for the book.
While I am building the index, I cannot stop myself from pulling out the pearls and nuggets of wisdom that helped make this trilogy one of my all-time favorite books.
I have no right to post these quotes here, and it is most likely a copyright infringement, but in my defense, the vast majority of the My Big TOE trilogy is available for free on google books right here:
http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=6To0902iZeYC&printsec=frontcover&dq=My+Big+TOE#v=onepage&q=&f=false
and so I don't think the author can get too upset with me. At least, I hope he doesn't get upset with me.
So without any further ado, here they are, my all-time favorite quotes written in my all-time favorite book by my all-time favorite author, at least for the time that is being.
“…the distinction between the objective physical outside world and the subjective nonphysical inside world of mind and consciousness is wholly dependent upon, and relative to, the observer.”
“Big Truth, once understood and assimilated, always modifies your intent, and invariably leads to personal change.”
“Once the mental door of indisputable fact is pried open, the light begins to flood through.”
“anyone can learn what I have learned”
“Becoming too enamored of paranormal phenomena can distract you from more important issues and retard or prevent your further development.”
“…the evidence, as well as the key to understanding, lies within your own experience – and nowhere else.”
“We almost always let our egos trick us into believing that we are much less ignorant than we actually are.”
“The quality of your being expresses the correctness of your understanding. Think about that a moment. What does the quality of your being say about the correctness of your understanding?”
“What is deeply ingrained in us is nearly impossible for us to notice – it becomes part of the invisible inner core of our being.”
“Big Truth must be understood deeply to be effectively applied.”
“The truth is not delicate; it will stand up to vigorous testing.”
“Belief is not a shortcut that will actually take you to a significant destination. Believing what others say is a risky business. You must discover truth and knowledge for yourself or it will not be your truth or your knowledge. Your truth and knowledge lives deeply and vibrantly within your being while someone else’s truth and knowledge can penetrate no deeper than your intellect.”
“There is a natural and necessary order to any developmental growth.”
“Good science starts with honesty, and honesty is most easily applied in an ego-free and fear-free environment.”
“To get out of the box, you first must step over its edge – an act too frightening and intimidating for most box dwellers who will always find plenty of good reasons why it is actually better to stay safely in the box.”
– “For every irrational rationalization there exists an equal but opposite irrational rationalization.” [Campbell’s Third Law of No Motion (otherwise known as the law of inaction-reaction)]
“Spiritual growth, personal growth, improving the quality of your consciousness, evolving your being, increasing your capacity to love, and decreasing the entropy of your consciousness are all essentially synonymous and equivalent.”
“We humans are generally as aware of our individuality as we are blind to our conformity – that is our nature.”
“All paths have benefits and challenges.”
“Our ignorance does not impose limits on the larger reality – only upon our understanding of it.”
“It may take an extremely long time (dim awareness can be very slow), but under the steady pressure of a relentless evolution constantly nudging all systems toward greater profitability, progress is eventually made as new possibilities are explored.”
“Pseudo-knowledge is useless except as a pacifier for a needy ego.”
“Appreciating your limitations is the first step toward obtaining wisdom.” “At the same time, creating apparent limitations where none actually exist by getting stuck in belief traps is a great waste of potential.”
“The ability to accurately assess one’s fundamental limitations differentiates the wise from the foolish”
“It is our free will, our self- interaction, and our interaction with others that creates the possibility of learning, which in turn creates our potential for growth.”
“Assuming responsibility for your life is a good place to start anything.”
“These maze rats are not dumb – they are merely confused and blinded by their belief systems. What should you do to help? Love them and let them be – they will eventually figure it out (explaining it to them often ends up confusing them more). Just love them and let them be – and evolve your consciousness to the greatest extent possible. That way, if asked, you can point out unseen opportunities and options from a more balanced and less ego driven perspective, serve as a good example, and provide encouragement through living proof that success is possible. That is about all you can do to help.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and in my further defense, I do own this book, I could very well have typed all of this up out of the copy my sisters bought me for my birthday, or one of the two copies I bought for myself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
While I am building the index, I cannot stop myself from pulling out the pearls and nuggets of wisdom that helped make this trilogy one of my all-time favorite books.
I have no right to post these quotes here, and it is most likely a copyright infringement, but in my defense, the vast majority of the My Big TOE trilogy is available for free on google books right here:
http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=6To0902iZeYC&printsec=frontcover&dq=My+Big+TOE#v=onepage&q=&f=false
and so I don't think the author can get too upset with me. At least, I hope he doesn't get upset with me.
So without any further ado, here they are, my all-time favorite quotes written in my all-time favorite book by my all-time favorite author, at least for the time that is being.
“…the distinction between the objective physical outside world and the subjective nonphysical inside world of mind and consciousness is wholly dependent upon, and relative to, the observer.”
“Big Truth, once understood and assimilated, always modifies your intent, and invariably leads to personal change.”
“Once the mental door of indisputable fact is pried open, the light begins to flood through.”
“anyone can learn what I have learned”
“Becoming too enamored of paranormal phenomena can distract you from more important issues and retard or prevent your further development.”
“…the evidence, as well as the key to understanding, lies within your own experience – and nowhere else.”
“We almost always let our egos trick us into believing that we are much less ignorant than we actually are.”
“The quality of your being expresses the correctness of your understanding. Think about that a moment. What does the quality of your being say about the correctness of your understanding?”
“What is deeply ingrained in us is nearly impossible for us to notice – it becomes part of the invisible inner core of our being.”
“Big Truth must be understood deeply to be effectively applied.”
“The truth is not delicate; it will stand up to vigorous testing.”
“Belief is not a shortcut that will actually take you to a significant destination. Believing what others say is a risky business. You must discover truth and knowledge for yourself or it will not be your truth or your knowledge. Your truth and knowledge lives deeply and vibrantly within your being while someone else’s truth and knowledge can penetrate no deeper than your intellect.”
“There is a natural and necessary order to any developmental growth.”
“Good science starts with honesty, and honesty is most easily applied in an ego-free and fear-free environment.”
“To get out of the box, you first must step over its edge – an act too frightening and intimidating for most box dwellers who will always find plenty of good reasons why it is actually better to stay safely in the box.”
– “For every irrational rationalization there exists an equal but opposite irrational rationalization.” [Campbell’s Third Law of No Motion (otherwise known as the law of inaction-reaction)]
“Spiritual growth, personal growth, improving the quality of your consciousness, evolving your being, increasing your capacity to love, and decreasing the entropy of your consciousness are all essentially synonymous and equivalent.”
“We humans are generally as aware of our individuality as we are blind to our conformity – that is our nature.”
“All paths have benefits and challenges.”
“Our ignorance does not impose limits on the larger reality – only upon our understanding of it.”
“It may take an extremely long time (dim awareness can be very slow), but under the steady pressure of a relentless evolution constantly nudging all systems toward greater profitability, progress is eventually made as new possibilities are explored.”
“Pseudo-knowledge is useless except as a pacifier for a needy ego.”
“Appreciating your limitations is the first step toward obtaining wisdom.” “At the same time, creating apparent limitations where none actually exist by getting stuck in belief traps is a great waste of potential.”
“The ability to accurately assess one’s fundamental limitations differentiates the wise from the foolish”
“It is our free will, our self- interaction, and our interaction with others that creates the possibility of learning, which in turn creates our potential for growth.”
“Assuming responsibility for your life is a good place to start anything.”
“These maze rats are not dumb – they are merely confused and blinded by their belief systems. What should you do to help? Love them and let them be – they will eventually figure it out (explaining it to them often ends up confusing them more). Just love them and let them be – and evolve your consciousness to the greatest extent possible. That way, if asked, you can point out unseen opportunities and options from a more balanced and less ego driven perspective, serve as a good example, and provide encouragement through living proof that success is possible. That is about all you can do to help.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and in my further defense, I do own this book, I could very well have typed all of this up out of the copy my sisters bought me for my birthday, or one of the two copies I bought for myself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Saturday, January 9, 2010
TOE Talk
I haven't blogged in a while for two main reasons: 1.) I've been mightily consumed in reading and assimilating Thomas Campbell's Trilogy "My Big TOE" and 2.) I recently made my blog more available/accessible than ever in the past and I believe that has made me somewhat reticent to spill the way I used to.
I'm not even sure what I came here to write about, but knowing me over these past three months or so, I imagine it has something to do with Tom Campbell. Ever since a couple of weeks before my birthday when I watched his London Lecture on YouTube (I will have to paste a link I guess or you can just go a couple posts back to get my initial impression as captured back then)
http://aerolynda.blogspot.com/2009/10/consciousness-connection.html
and basically became a convert, he's all I want to talk about. Convert is a very bad way of putting it though since his theory is not a church or a religion any more than I believe Michael Sharp's Lightning Path is, although I can see the potential for it in both.
Now I am reading his trilogy and assimilating it like I said, which basically means finding all of the similarities I can between this new material and everything else I've absorbed through the years, which of course more than anything is the work of Neale Donald Walsch.
I have befriended a couple of dear folks on the My Big TOE discussion forums and one of them has lovingly suggested in a private message or two that there may be a book in me somewhere. Well after giving it a modicum of introspection, I thought if there's really something in there, maybe it's got something to do with comparing and contrasting the teachings from both, if I can manage to finish My Big TOE (henceforth to be shortened in my references to "MBT") and continue comprehending at least as much as I've managed to figure out so far.
I have the comments I made on YouTube to refer to, where I pointed out most of the comparisons that sprang to mind most easily, as a jumping off point.
I guess I will keep this blog updated with my progress, if any gets made!
Edit: Tom Campbell wants to include me in his acknowledgements! OMG I am in heaven! Finally, for once, my incurable, incessant typo-spotting affliction works in my favor!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm not even sure what I came here to write about, but knowing me over these past three months or so, I imagine it has something to do with Tom Campbell. Ever since a couple of weeks before my birthday when I watched his London Lecture on YouTube (I will have to paste a link I guess or you can just go a couple posts back to get my initial impression as captured back then)
http://aerolynda.blogspot.com/2009/10/consciousness-connection.html
and basically became a convert, he's all I want to talk about. Convert is a very bad way of putting it though since his theory is not a church or a religion any more than I believe Michael Sharp's Lightning Path is, although I can see the potential for it in both.
Now I am reading his trilogy and assimilating it like I said, which basically means finding all of the similarities I can between this new material and everything else I've absorbed through the years, which of course more than anything is the work of Neale Donald Walsch.
I have befriended a couple of dear folks on the My Big TOE discussion forums and one of them has lovingly suggested in a private message or two that there may be a book in me somewhere. Well after giving it a modicum of introspection, I thought if there's really something in there, maybe it's got something to do with comparing and contrasting the teachings from both, if I can manage to finish My Big TOE (henceforth to be shortened in my references to "MBT") and continue comprehending at least as much as I've managed to figure out so far.
I have the comments I made on YouTube to refer to, where I pointed out most of the comparisons that sprang to mind most easily, as a jumping off point.
I guess I will keep this blog updated with my progress, if any gets made!
Edit: Tom Campbell wants to include me in his acknowledgements! OMG I am in heaven! Finally, for once, my incurable, incessant typo-spotting affliction works in my favor!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Saturday, December 12, 2009
My Theory of the Mass by Lynda G. Sterling
NOTE: I started writing this book years ago, before reading anything by Neale Donald Walsch, Tom Campbell or Dr. Michael Sharp. When I read the first CwG books, I realized mine didn't need to be written.
This is all I could find of it so far, I know there is more somewhere, buried.
Introduction
I had no religious upbringing. I was never trained in any religion. Therefore, I do not claim to have any religious knowledge or background. I wonder sometimes if that’s why I came up with my theory of the Mass. I had to have some explanation for life, the Universe, mysterious things like miracles, yet I could not consider “God” to be the reason for these occurrences. I could not believe in a male God; a God who made man “in his image”.
I remembered reading somewhere that in the original language of the bible, there were no masculine or feminine pronouns. The same pronoun meant he, she, it and more, and the meaning was gleaned from the context. Somehow, somewhere, through the ages of men, something was lost in the translation. Most people had come to think of God as a male. Being female I simply could not buy this idea. I could not swallow the thought that the all-powerful force in this place could possibly ever have a penis.
You may notice I frequently use tired cliches. That is because I am truly not a writer. I am truly just a person with a theory I want to share. So let’s get on with it...
Chapter 1: The beginning
Once upon a time, there was an infinite mass of energy. All that existed was this mass. This mass was all that there was. God, the universe, Allah, Buddha, the All That There Is, none of these existed, only the mass. The mass spent millions of eons getting to know and to love itself. The mass got to know and to love itself intimately. Then one day the mass became bored. It knew itself well enough to know it had become lonely. It had become sick of being All That There Was. So the mass came up with a plan.
“As well as I know myself,” the mass thought to itself, “and I know myself well, I want to get to know myself better. I want to know how I will behave, given different circumstances. I want to know how I would behave were I born into poverty to parents who did not plan for me. Likewise, I want to know how I will behave if born to loving, generous, wealthy parents with servants and everything money can buy. I want to know what it’s like to be tall, short, skinny, fat, smart, dumb and so forth. I want to know how I would interact with different entities on different planets and in different time periods. I want to have fingers and eyes and to smell things, and hear. I want to try things and do things and go places and love. I want to experience everything and mull it all over. I think I will create myself some excitement.”
And so, the universe came into being. There was a big bang, or a spark, or whatever theory you like to believe about the beginning of time. And eventually people were there. And people were there through the ages. Smart, short, dumb, fat, all types of people lived all kinds of lives. They evolved from hunters and gatherers to conveyors of information. But people forgot one fundamental fact: they all were a part of the mass. They forgot that they came here to know one another, to love one another, and to experience things and live life.
Throughout this book, you’ll hear me say, “we came here to know one another.” I truly believe this is so. All of my beliefs about religion and death and coincidence and fear and true love, all tie-in one way or another to this theory I’ve developed of the mass. Through books that I’ve read and discussions I’ve had, I believe in reincarnation. I believe one soul can live many lifetimes, and that the time in between is spent studying. I believe the universe is one big giant schoolhouse, and everything we do while we’re here has to do in some way with our learning. I believe that enlightenment is a gradual process, one each of us does on his own. It will be my goal, through the course of this book, to explain why I believe as I do.
Chapter 2: Visualization
I started learning about creative visualization approximately ten years ago. Ever since I learned we only use ten percent or less of our brainpower, I believed the additional 90% must be for something phenomenal. If we can accomplish as much as we have using less than one-tenth of our brain, imagine what could be accomplished if we were operating at full capacity! Or even at ninety percent! I have long believed that extrasensory perception is more than a likelihood, but fact. I believe I have experienced telepathy myself, as well as hearing the voice of my inner self. I believe in the forces of prayer and visualization, in everyday aspects of life. I believe that, more than just “positive thinking” it is possible to do things with our minds. I believe we can act as clear channels for love, and I believe those who do are immortal. I believe it is possible to live together in peace and it is my hope that this book will encourage that.
Anyway, I believe it is possible, if we think the right thoughts, to actually make things happen in our lives. I can’t believe it is coincidence that ten years ago I started dreaming of, wishing for, whatever you want to call it, a house and a dog and good cars. I find it so humorous, when looking over old notebooks, how perfectly everything happened. I can’t thank Shakti Gawain and Sanaya Roman enough for writing the books that I read. Gradually I realized whatever I spent the most of my time thinking about, or wishing for, or just concentrating on like a laser, would actually come true for me in time. I first visualized being a writer, then a professional gambler, and eventually a self-made, independently wealthy, altruistic and generous multi-billionaire who donates to charity and gives homeless creatures a home. So far I’m a writer and a pretty good gambler, but the billions are slow to arrive.
Chapter 3: Fear of Death, after Death, Crossing Over and Mom
I have long believed it is possible to communicate with the dead once they’re gone.
For most of my life I’ve been interested in people who claim they can “Speak to the Dead.” I don’t think it’s a small coincidence that I am alive in the time that I am, because more and more authors and books on the subject have come along since I first had these feelings. I used to pillage the TV guide listings for talk shows featuring Sylvia Browne or John Edward. I was particularly fond of James van Praagh, with those beautiful, honest blue eyes. I had the good fortune to sit for John Holland in Boston and through him, my Mom gave me a rose.
All the books I’ve read about near death experiences confirm what I’ve come to believe. When we die, at the moment of death, foremost we don’t feel a thing. There is no pain associated with the moment of death, just an incomprehensible freedom and love. There is the freedom of being out of our physical bodies and the remembering of what we once were. There is the overwhelming sense of “having come home” and the powerful forces of love. There is the remembering of all we once knew as the truth, and the comparison to how we lived life. There is a life review, where we watch what we’ve done, and remark how we could have done better. There is a reunion with souls that we loved here on earth and the feeling of again being wrapped, enveloped, in the light of God’s love. Now, I said in the introduction, about God and all that, but this explanation satisfies most. Heaven, or most people’s conception of it, is basically what I believe too. You go home, you see the light and feel the love, and remember all you once knew. The very idea of having all of my questions answered invokes visions of heaven for me. But I had trouble reconciling my beliefs about after-death communication with my beliefs about life after life. If someone could be reborn, if my dog Sabrina could be the reincarnated soul of my friend Mikey’s dog Norton, then how could Norton’s soul still be in a place where he could be contacted by someone like John Edward? I had to devise a more clarified vision of what does it mean to be here. Then I suddenly read in a book the concept of multiple galaxies. Suppose for a moment you reached a crossroads in your life, a place where an important decision needed making. Suppose you then split, into two different yous, and each of you made one decision. This is a very difficult concept to grasp, I know, and I am still figuring it out for myself. But suppose every choice you ever had to make in your life, you actually got to live out both decisions? One of you, the you that you know, made the choice that you made, but just suppose if you can, that’s not all. Suppose you split off and you lived out both choices, and later you looked down both paths? This is why I feel that some of us have that uncontrollable urge to “see what I would have had” playing games. Whenever, in poker, I would fold and not draw, I had to check the person’s cards on my left who “got what I would have had.” Or in dice, like in Yahtzee, if you take the full house, would you have pulled four-of-a if you rolled on three fives? In my theory of the mass, there’s no need to worry! You go down the path you are sure is more right, and it all will work out in the end!
My theory explains why I felt such a strong bond with the people at work when I took my last job. I had interviewed for the same job nearly a year before but had turned it down because I was not ready to leave the place I was at. Ten months and three layoffs later, I was singing a different tune. So when I took the job and met all my co-workers, they were shockingly familiar to me, even though we had all just met. The multiple universe theory would say that I knew these people from having actually taken the job a year before, meaning that another me in another universe had actually been working with these people for the last eleven months!
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Edit - Just found a more complete copy - I will post when I am able.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is all I could find of it so far, I know there is more somewhere, buried.
Introduction
I had no religious upbringing. I was never trained in any religion. Therefore, I do not claim to have any religious knowledge or background. I wonder sometimes if that’s why I came up with my theory of the Mass. I had to have some explanation for life, the Universe, mysterious things like miracles, yet I could not consider “God” to be the reason for these occurrences. I could not believe in a male God; a God who made man “in his image”.
I remembered reading somewhere that in the original language of the bible, there were no masculine or feminine pronouns. The same pronoun meant he, she, it and more, and the meaning was gleaned from the context. Somehow, somewhere, through the ages of men, something was lost in the translation. Most people had come to think of God as a male. Being female I simply could not buy this idea. I could not swallow the thought that the all-powerful force in this place could possibly ever have a penis.
You may notice I frequently use tired cliches. That is because I am truly not a writer. I am truly just a person with a theory I want to share. So let’s get on with it...
Chapter 1: The beginning
Once upon a time, there was an infinite mass of energy. All that existed was this mass. This mass was all that there was. God, the universe, Allah, Buddha, the All That There Is, none of these existed, only the mass. The mass spent millions of eons getting to know and to love itself. The mass got to know and to love itself intimately. Then one day the mass became bored. It knew itself well enough to know it had become lonely. It had become sick of being All That There Was. So the mass came up with a plan.
“As well as I know myself,” the mass thought to itself, “and I know myself well, I want to get to know myself better. I want to know how I will behave, given different circumstances. I want to know how I would behave were I born into poverty to parents who did not plan for me. Likewise, I want to know how I will behave if born to loving, generous, wealthy parents with servants and everything money can buy. I want to know what it’s like to be tall, short, skinny, fat, smart, dumb and so forth. I want to know how I would interact with different entities on different planets and in different time periods. I want to have fingers and eyes and to smell things, and hear. I want to try things and do things and go places and love. I want to experience everything and mull it all over. I think I will create myself some excitement.”
And so, the universe came into being. There was a big bang, or a spark, or whatever theory you like to believe about the beginning of time. And eventually people were there. And people were there through the ages. Smart, short, dumb, fat, all types of people lived all kinds of lives. They evolved from hunters and gatherers to conveyors of information. But people forgot one fundamental fact: they all were a part of the mass. They forgot that they came here to know one another, to love one another, and to experience things and live life.
Throughout this book, you’ll hear me say, “we came here to know one another.” I truly believe this is so. All of my beliefs about religion and death and coincidence and fear and true love, all tie-in one way or another to this theory I’ve developed of the mass. Through books that I’ve read and discussions I’ve had, I believe in reincarnation. I believe one soul can live many lifetimes, and that the time in between is spent studying. I believe the universe is one big giant schoolhouse, and everything we do while we’re here has to do in some way with our learning. I believe that enlightenment is a gradual process, one each of us does on his own. It will be my goal, through the course of this book, to explain why I believe as I do.
Chapter 2: Visualization
I started learning about creative visualization approximately ten years ago. Ever since I learned we only use ten percent or less of our brainpower, I believed the additional 90% must be for something phenomenal. If we can accomplish as much as we have using less than one-tenth of our brain, imagine what could be accomplished if we were operating at full capacity! Or even at ninety percent! I have long believed that extrasensory perception is more than a likelihood, but fact. I believe I have experienced telepathy myself, as well as hearing the voice of my inner self. I believe in the forces of prayer and visualization, in everyday aspects of life. I believe that, more than just “positive thinking” it is possible to do things with our minds. I believe we can act as clear channels for love, and I believe those who do are immortal. I believe it is possible to live together in peace and it is my hope that this book will encourage that.
Anyway, I believe it is possible, if we think the right thoughts, to actually make things happen in our lives. I can’t believe it is coincidence that ten years ago I started dreaming of, wishing for, whatever you want to call it, a house and a dog and good cars. I find it so humorous, when looking over old notebooks, how perfectly everything happened. I can’t thank Shakti Gawain and Sanaya Roman enough for writing the books that I read. Gradually I realized whatever I spent the most of my time thinking about, or wishing for, or just concentrating on like a laser, would actually come true for me in time. I first visualized being a writer, then a professional gambler, and eventually a self-made, independently wealthy, altruistic and generous multi-billionaire who donates to charity and gives homeless creatures a home. So far I’m a writer and a pretty good gambler, but the billions are slow to arrive.
Chapter 3: Fear of Death, after Death, Crossing Over and Mom
I have long believed it is possible to communicate with the dead once they’re gone.
For most of my life I’ve been interested in people who claim they can “Speak to the Dead.” I don’t think it’s a small coincidence that I am alive in the time that I am, because more and more authors and books on the subject have come along since I first had these feelings. I used to pillage the TV guide listings for talk shows featuring Sylvia Browne or John Edward. I was particularly fond of James van Praagh, with those beautiful, honest blue eyes. I had the good fortune to sit for John Holland in Boston and through him, my Mom gave me a rose.
All the books I’ve read about near death experiences confirm what I’ve come to believe. When we die, at the moment of death, foremost we don’t feel a thing. There is no pain associated with the moment of death, just an incomprehensible freedom and love. There is the freedom of being out of our physical bodies and the remembering of what we once were. There is the overwhelming sense of “having come home” and the powerful forces of love. There is the remembering of all we once knew as the truth, and the comparison to how we lived life. There is a life review, where we watch what we’ve done, and remark how we could have done better. There is a reunion with souls that we loved here on earth and the feeling of again being wrapped, enveloped, in the light of God’s love. Now, I said in the introduction, about God and all that, but this explanation satisfies most. Heaven, or most people’s conception of it, is basically what I believe too. You go home, you see the light and feel the love, and remember all you once knew. The very idea of having all of my questions answered invokes visions of heaven for me. But I had trouble reconciling my beliefs about after-death communication with my beliefs about life after life. If someone could be reborn, if my dog Sabrina could be the reincarnated soul of my friend Mikey’s dog Norton, then how could Norton’s soul still be in a place where he could be contacted by someone like John Edward? I had to devise a more clarified vision of what does it mean to be here. Then I suddenly read in a book the concept of multiple galaxies. Suppose for a moment you reached a crossroads in your life, a place where an important decision needed making. Suppose you then split, into two different yous, and each of you made one decision. This is a very difficult concept to grasp, I know, and I am still figuring it out for myself. But suppose every choice you ever had to make in your life, you actually got to live out both decisions? One of you, the you that you know, made the choice that you made, but just suppose if you can, that’s not all. Suppose you split off and you lived out both choices, and later you looked down both paths? This is why I feel that some of us have that uncontrollable urge to “see what I would have had” playing games. Whenever, in poker, I would fold and not draw, I had to check the person’s cards on my left who “got what I would have had.” Or in dice, like in Yahtzee, if you take the full house, would you have pulled four-of-a if you rolled on three fives? In my theory of the mass, there’s no need to worry! You go down the path you are sure is more right, and it all will work out in the end!
My theory explains why I felt such a strong bond with the people at work when I took my last job. I had interviewed for the same job nearly a year before but had turned it down because I was not ready to leave the place I was at. Ten months and three layoffs later, I was singing a different tune. So when I took the job and met all my co-workers, they were shockingly familiar to me, even though we had all just met. The multiple universe theory would say that I knew these people from having actually taken the job a year before, meaning that another me in another universe had actually been working with these people for the last eleven months!
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Edit - Just found a more complete copy - I will post when I am able.
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